Live in the Present Moment

We can tell that winter is coming here at Hold Your Horses Farm. The grass has turned brown, with only little patches of green still peeking through. Our humans have started giving us some hay in the round feeder to help keep us warm at night. Although ice has not yet formed on the water trough, we can tell that colder weather is coming.


Some mornings it is foggy and cold. There is frost on the ground. We don't like to graze in the frost covered ground until the sun has warmed it up a little bit. But we don't worry. We take advantage of the present moment. We play games with each other until it warms up. We not only have fun, we keep ourselves warm in the process.

One of the ways that horses are so different from humans is that we live in the present. We don't forget the lessons of the past, but we don't worry about them. The past is past. We don't dwell on things that happened yesterday, and we don't use them as excuses for not doing something today. We live each day--all day--in the present moment.

That means that we focus on eating when we are eating; playing when we are playing; and working (usually with the humans) when we are working. Yes, we always keep our eyes open for danger, but we don't focus on it. We live in the present moment. What else is there?

I think that humans could benefit if they did more of that. I hear them talking sometimes about things that happened a long time ago. They seem stuck and unable to move beyond it. I don't understand--how does that help them? I can't imagine running across the field looking backwards, but humans seem to focus on the past a lot. They seem to pay more attention on where they have been and what happened, than where they are going right now.

If we can play games in the fog, and live fully in the present moment, certainly humans ought to be able to do that too. Put your old memories of the past behind you, and come join us. Live in the present moment!

Neighs and Whinnies,

Shade

P.S. If you are one of those humans who are stuck in the past, give my human, Linda Pucci a call

(865-983-7544). She works with people to help them let go of negative emotions and limiting beliefs from the past so that you can live fully--and joyfully--in the present moment.

How Much Energy Will You Put into Things You Want to Achieve?

October 15, 2009

Lately we have been noticing something interesting about the humans who come to Hold Your Horses Farm to work with us horses. The humans want us to do something for them-to let them lead us into the round pen; or move around them in a circle; or jump over an obstacle they place in our path.But many of them don't seem willing to put much energy into getting us to do it.  They ask us a bit half-heartedly.  It seems like they don't really mean it.

Naturally, when they don't seem to have much energy for the task, we don't either.  If you ask me to do something in a half-hearted way, I'll give you a half-hearted response.  If you want energy from me, I need some energy from YOU.

Don't get me wrong.  You don't have to overwhelm me with the power of your request.  Horses ask each other to do things all the time, and we use only as much energy as is necessary to get the job done.  Sometimes that means flicking an ear at Ginger to get her to move.  Other times it means nipping Preacher on the rear to get him to move out of my way.  Sometimes it means shouldering Shade and pushing him out of the way.  Horses don't overdo it.  We simply figure out how much energy we need to use.  We often start out small and increase the energy as we go along.  I think you humans call that "trial and error."  We keep trying things until we find the amount of energy and pressure that WORKS.

What seems to be missing when humans approach a task is that they use the amount of energy they think is necessary; then they don't increase it when that doesn't work.  If you are saying to yourselves, "I'd like that nice horse to follow me," and then not demonstrating that you are determined to make it happen, and, instead, thinking about how tired you are, I'm going to plan to sit in the shade and sleep until I'm convinced that you really mean it and will back it up.

I wonder if you humans hold back your energy with all of the goals you set?  If so, I'd suggest that you consider increasing the energy you use to get what you want. Because if your goal isn't important enough to put some energy into, you might as well forget it.  Any goal you pursue will take energy.

We horses use energy to reach our goal of eating the grass, for instance.  We have to move around and find the best grass to eat, especially this time of year.  Preacher likes the clover, so he really has to hunt around to achieve that goal.  If we were not willing to put some energy into the search, we'd be very hungry and frustrated.  When we are willing to expend the energy to find the best grass, we're fat and happy. (Actually expending the energy keeps us from getting too fat).

I think you humans need to look at what you are trying to achieve and how much energy you need to use to make it happen.  When you increase your energy, I think you will have more success-with us and with your other goals.

Neighs & Whinnies,

Goomba


PS. If you have trouble getting started with your goals, my human, Linda Pucci can help.  She knows all sorts of ways to help you get started and keep moving.  She helps lots of humans get unstuck in their life or their career. You can reach her at 865-983-7544 or by email at Linda@InnerResourceCenter.com.   I'll bet she can get you moving.  And she won't even have to use a halter and lead rope! 

The Key is to Get Moving

I just love hanging out in the shade of our run-in shed here at Hold Your Horses Farm. The flies aren't as bad in the shade, and I can enjoy the company of my herd. Sometimes, though, the humans have a different idea, and want me to "work."

They put on my halter, and begin to try to move me with the lead rope. They want me to leave the comfort of my shed and go out into the sunlight and into the round pen. Don't get me wrong. The "work" they want me to do isn't plowing fields or carrying heavy humans around on my back for hours. They want me to interact with other humans and help them learn important lessons.

I start teaching right away. The human pulls on the lead rope to try to get me to move. I plant my feet. I want to see if they really mean it. I'm not going to make this easy. Sometimes they talk to me, and I can tell by their tone of voice and their body language if they are determined or not. I weigh about a thousand pounds (the grass has been lush this summer). I am stronger than they are. I'm pretty determined to stay in the shade. They pull. I dig in with my back feet and throw my weight backwards. I can tell that they are beginning to get frustrated. I think they might give up and let me stay here. I think this is a test of what they do when they encounter things that are difficult. I think I can win this. They pull; I resist. I can do this all day.

Then someone moves me to the side. I can go in that direction. This must be a compromise. I am willing to move a few steps. Or someone taps me on the rear with the lead rope. That's annoying. I'll move to get away from that. The point is, I have begun to move.

Once I have started moving in some direction, I know I am ready to work. They have learned the lesson I wanted to teach: Even though movement toward a goal isn't always straightforward, the key to reaching a goal is to get moving and keep moving. Once the movement toward a goal begins, you can easily change directions if things aren't going in exactly the right direction.

This isn't only true of moving horses. It is also true of your ability to move towards your human goals. The key is to get moving. Do something. Take action. You can always adjust your course, but you get nowhere if you don't take that first step.

Neighs and Whinnies,

Preacher

P.S. If you have trouble getting started with your goals, my human, Linda Pucci can help. She knows all sorts of ways to help you get started and keep moving. She helps lots of humans get unstuck in their life or their career. You can reach her at 865-983-7544 or by email at Linda@InnerResourceCenter.com. I'll bet she can get you moving. And she won't even have to use a halter and lead rope!

© 2009 Linda S. Pucci, Ph.D.

Committees Are Not Always the Best Way

"A camel is a horse made by committee."

After the Rain…

We have had quite a bit of rain at Hold Your Horses Farm lately. When it rains, we horses huddle together inside the run-in shed at the top of the hill. It gives us shelter, and we like being together when it is really windy and scary. Sometimes there is lightning and thunder. We don't like that very much. We try to stay away from the trees, and move off the hill when we need to.

Sometimes it rains for a few minutes; sometimes for most of the day. Horses don't really care about time, so we don't mind. We know that eventually the rain will stop and we will once again romp through the fields, and be able to graze in the sweet grass.

After the rain, we often gather where the water has flowed through the drainage ditch. We know that the grass there is especially lush. It tastes good and we know it is good for us. We graze for hours after the rain in that one area.

In the places where the grass is sparse and dirt shows through, the rain has left behind mud. We love to roll there. We can get especially muddy and sloppy. I like it best when I have big muddy clods of dirt hanging off my mane. Being a mare with a mature figure, I sometimes can't roll all the way over; then I get muddy only on one side.

The boys play in the mud, chasing each other and slipping and sliding a bit on the muddy hill. I'm too mature for that, but I secretly love watching it.

Even though the rain can be scary or can mess up our grazing plans for the day, we know it will pass eventually. We know that we can enjoy what happens after the rain.

I'm not sure if humans know that. Humans have rain in their lives as well, but it isn't the kind that gets them wet. They have things happen that spoils their plans, messes up their lives, and makes it difficult for them to keep their footing. What they seem to have trouble remembering is that the rain will eventually go away. I think sometimes they get stuck in believing that it will ALWAYS rain in their lives. They forget that good things come from "rainy times." After all, you can't play in the mud unless it has been raining.

You don't need to be upset when it rains. Things happen. It is part of the cycle of nature. You can learn about yourself and your herd from those rainy times. You can learn to avoid those areas that are likely to flood you with struggle, just like we avoid the low areas of our pasture when it rains.

I think humans need to remember to play after the rain and to take advantage of the opportunities when the sun comes out. When you do, you won't be as upset by those "rainy times." You'll hunker down, do what you need to do to take care of yourself, and wait till it passes. Because it will pass. I know. I'm a mare who has survived many rainstorms.

Neighs and Whinnies,

P.S. If you find yourself stuck in a lot of "rainstorms" in your life, you might want to talk with my human, Linda Pucci. She helps people find the resources to weather their storms and move beyond them. She's really good at helping people figure out what to do to prepare themselves for rain in their lives, and learn from their rainy experiences. She is good at helping you stay calm in a storm, too. You can call her at 865-983-7544 or email her at Linda@InnerResourceCenter.com. Tell her about your rainy times. I'll bet she can help.

The Importance of Mutual Respect

There are four of us horses living here at Hold Your Horses Farm. We share our space with a couple of dogs that often visit from a neighbor’s house; a small, grey cat; some assorted rodents who aren’t a bit afraid of that cat; and our two humans, Linda and Bernie. Other humans sometimes visit at one of the two white buildings where our humans spend their time, and they often come and visit us or stop at the fence and exchange a “hello.”

Other animals, like deer, raccoons, possum or an occasional fox pass through the farm from time to time, but we are not very disturbed by them. We know what to expect from them and they know what to expect from us. They are just passing through and they know this is our territory.

Horses live in a herd and have to learn how to get along with each other and the others with whom they share their space. We have to respect each other in order to get along.

We each communicate with each other and the other animals and humans through our body language. Shade flicks an ear to warn Goomba away from his food dish. I nip at Ginger to get her to move to another part of the pasture faster. Goomba lowers his head toward one of the dogs when he comes too close. Ginger moves away when people try to hug her and get too mushy.

Letting others know what you expect of them is important, and we communicate pretty clearly about our boundaries. And, because we are part of the herd, we respect each other’s boundaries as well. I think that sort of mutual respect is absolutely necessary.

Horses know how important boundaries and mutual respect are. I’m always surprised that humans don’t seem to know this as well. I’ve seen them allow Goomba to eat the buttons on their shirt. Sometimes they approach me too quickly and I let them know by running away that they have come too close without being invited.

I don’t always think people do a very good job of setting boundaries or respecting each other either. I think that if humans realized how important mutual respect is, they would practice it more. If they recognized that each animal or human has something important to offer and respect them for the part they play, there would be a lot more harmony in their herd.

Horses know that mutual respect is composed of setting and enforcing your boundaries–what is acceptable to you and unacceptable to you. Boundaries are like rules you set for others, so that you feel respected and comfortable. When somebody violates your boundaries–breaks your rules for conduct in the herd–the reaction needs to be clear and swift.

Horses do this without holding a grudge. We know we have to enforce our boundaries. We know this is part of mutual respect and we have to have that to survive. We do it clearly, swiftly and easily. We don’t take it personally like humans seem to do.

My advice to humans would be to pay more attention to respecting each other, both by appreciating and respecting what others have to offer, and by demanding that others respect you as well. When you do that, you are clear with your rules and expectations, but it isn’t personal. Everyone violates a boundary now and then, and there are consequences when you do. Setting and enforcing boundaries is part of respecting yourself. How can you have a place among the herd if you don’t? How will the others in your herd learn to respect you if you don’t demand it? Mutual respect is the key to a happy and successful herd.

Neighs & Whinnies,

Preacher

P.S. If you have trouble setting your boundaries or being respected in your herd, my human, Linda Pucci can help you. She’s really good at helping humans set boundaries and figure out what to do to get respect, and be respectful in return. Call her at 865-983-7544 or check out http://www.innerresourcecenter.com/ to contact her by email.

© 2009 Linda S. Pucci, Ph.D.

Having Time Alone Is Important

Horses are herd animals; that means we tend to feel most comfortable when we are with our herd. We group together for safety and security.

Much as I like hanging out with my herd, and spending time grazing with my buddies at Hold Your Horses Farm, there are times when a mare of a certain age likes to have her privacy.

Most mornings, while the boys are grazing in the pasture near the road, you’ll find me alone in the run-in shed. The sun streams in and I can stand there and doze without worrying that I’m standing too close to someone else, or that they will start something with each other and wake me up. Eventually they come back up the hill and wake me up, but by then, it is time to eat.

Sometimes in the afternoon, while the boys are dozing in the shade of the trees, you’ll find me 50 yards away, grazing on the sweet grass by myself. I like to move where I want, without worrying about being herded away from a particularly juicy morsel. I can be alone with my thoughts and my chewing, free to snort and sigh as I see fit. Having time alone is important. It allows me to focus on the things that are important to me without distraction.

I’ve noticed that humans are herd animals too; at least they seem to like to hang out with others. I think they don’t always take the time for themselves, though. Taking time to be alone, away from the herd would give them a chance to catch up on their thoughts. If they spent time more alone like I do, it would allow them to figure out what they want to do or where they want to go next, without someone else influencing their decision. When you are a herd animal, it is easy to get swept up in the movement of others. When you do that, you are sometimes ignoring what is right for you.

I find it is useful to have both time with the herd and time apart. Both are valuable. I wish that you humans would discover this by taking some time to be apart from your herd every now and then. When you do you can really get to know yourself and can focus on what is important to you.

Neighs and Whinnies,

Ginger

P.S. If you aren't comfortable outside of your herd, my human, Linda Pucci can help you. She helps people learn how to be come self-confident and to tune into their own intuition and judgment. For more information, go to http://www.innerresourceccenter.com/

No Flies on Me--Get Rid of YOUR Aggravations

The weather has gotten warm and sunny here at Hold Your Horses Farm, and along with it has come our yearly pests–the flies. Horses have a lot of different flies that like to hang around. Right now, the flies are small and don’t bite. The ones that really bother us are the ones that love to take a chunk out of us. That makes us jump!

Horses are very resourceful, so we have a lot of different ways to get flies off. Sometimes we brush up against the bark of the trees that grow in the middle of our pasture. Sometimes we roll in the cool mud and layer it on so that it protects our hide.

Usually to get away from the flies, we hang out in the shade during the hottest part of the day. It seems that the flies like it when we sweat, so staying cool is important. We have our tails to swish them away when they land, and can move our skin in sort of a shudder when we feel them light on us. Sometimes we are also able to bite at them, if they have landed where we can reach. We make it uncomfortable for them to bug us!

Sometimes we permit our humans to spray us, but I really don’t like that spray bottle. It makes a funny noise, and it smells funny. I usually run away, but the others tolerate it better than I do.

We’re used to the flies being part of our lives and we do what we can to deal with them. They are an annoyance that are part of life. I’ve noticed that humans often have things that annoy them the way flies annoy us. But unlike horses, humans don’t always do anything about it. It often seems like they just sit back and tolerate those things they don’t like.

That doesn’t seem like a very effective way to get rid of them. In fact, if those things you are tolerating were flies, not chasing them away would just invite more. I wonder if you humans invite more difficulties when you don’t take care of those things that “light on you?”

I’d like to suggest that when something happens that you don’t like, do something about it–tell someone, shake it off, get away from the aggravation, or take a stand. When you do, your “flies” will think twice about bothering you. Or at least you’ll have handled the situation. Your “flies” may not disappear permanently any more than ours do, but when you take action, they will move on.

If they don’t, just find a good rough tree, and scratch!

Neighs and whinnies,

Goomba


P.S. If you have a lot of things that irritate you, you might want to talk to my human, Linda Pucci about it. She helps people figure out how to deal with the things they have been tolerating. You can call her at 865-983-7544 or email her at Linda@InnerResourceCenter.com .

You’re also welcome to come to our farm and the horses will show you how to stand up to those things that aggravate you! We’re very good teachers!

We Get By With a Little Help from Our Friends--No Matter WHO They Are

Here in the herd at Hold Your Horses Farm, we help each other. When Shade needs his back scratched, I'm there for him. When Ginger is being bothered by a human who wants to hug her, Preacher comes over and chases them away. I often end up chasing that dog that thinks he can herd us. We manage pretty well.

But every now and then we need the help of our human friends. That was true this past month. Every day, one of our humans comes and gives us grain. It is a nice change from the grass in the pasture, and we always come quickly. Each of us has our own feeding bowl, and we each know exactly where to go.

This past month I got my food, but had to move over to steal grain from Preacher. You see, there was something in my food bowl. It was blue and shiny and had a long tail. I stuck my nose in initially, then backed off quickly. My human, Linda Pucci, noticed, and came to check out why I wouldn't eat out of my own bowl. She saw it and pronounced it a "skink," whatever that it. She picked it up and put it on the ground. It scurried away and I was glad. It gave me the creeps and I wanted to stomp it.

The next day was Ginger's turn to need help. After sticking her nose into her food dish, she backed off quickly and squealed. Linda came to see, and found a couple of black things in the dish. She said they were "crickets" and scooped them out after several tries.

Even though they are not officially part of our herd, it is useful to have humans to help us. Having someone help, whether it is a horse or human is important. We're all interconnected and having someone to depend on makes life easier and safer.

Sometimes I don't think humans understand this. They try to do things alone, or don't reach out for help when they need it. I guess they don't know that things don't work very well when you are the only one to depend on. Being part of a herd is important. I think humans need to remember that THEY are also part of a herd. We all are.

We can help each other. We can all reach out to humans, horses or even dogs that are in need of some help. We can ALL ask for help when we need it. It doesn't mean we're weak. We all need our friends to get by.

It doesn't matter WHO the friends are. Believe me, I'll help you any time I can. Just don't ask me to do anything with those yucky skinks. If that's the problem, we'll ask Linda.

Neighs and Whinnies,

Goomba

P.S. If you want your life to be easier, contact our human, Linda Pucci, Ph.D. She can help you with all sorts of human problems. In fact, she's really good at helping people find solutions to their problems quickly. Call her at (865) 983-7544 to find out how...

Do Something When You Are Uncomfortable

When horses are uncomfortable, we change our situation. When it is hot, we go into the shade. That keeps the sun off our backs, and the flies are fewer. I'm always surprised by how long humans stay in uncomfortable situations, when they could so easily change their situation. When you are uncomfortable--DO something about it!

Neighs and Whinnies,

Preacher

9 year old Tennessee Walker
From the Herd at Hold Your Horses Farm

Graze in Your Own Pasture

Horses are herd animals, but we aren’t always together. Each of us likes to go off by ourselves from time to time. We like to keep an eye on each other, so we are usually within sight of one another. Hold Your Horses Farm isn’t a very big place–only about 7 acres–so that isn’t very hard to do.

We do have some hills that can block our view of each other, but as long as we can hear or see each other, we don’t mind being separate. In fact, sometimes it is essential to get away from Goomba and his antics. (He’s just as big a clown with the horses as he is with the humans).

You will often find me off by myself, sometimes grazing in a completely different pasture than the other three horses. They like to stick together more than I do. I like to know where they are, but I like to choose my own grazing spot most of the time. I know what sort of grass I like best, and where it is best for me. I feel most comfortable and satisfied when I’m where I want to be, rather than where others want to be.

I think it is important that people also graze in their own pasture; that they find the place that is best for them. Just as horses don’t always follow each other around everywhere, people don’t need to either. I think people need to figure out what part of their field is most comfortable, most nourishing, and a place where they can thrive and grow. They don’t have to stay in a herd and do everything the way others do it.

Like horses do, humans can connect with each other when they need or want to, and keep an eye on each other. They can be social just like we are. But they can also pick the best pasture to work in.

Our human, Linda Pucci did that when she moved her office to the farm several years ago. Other humans stayed in town and had offices there. But she wanted to graze in a different pasture. I think that is working for her, since I see people coming and going to her office most days. Other times I peek in the window and see her on that telephone thing--talking to other humans, I think.

If you stay with the herd ALL the time, you won’t have a chance to really find the pasture that is best for you. No one else can find it for you–not even a smart horse like me. Since each horse (and human) are different, what is best for one, may not be best for everyone else.

My advice to you this month is to keep an eye on your herd, but choose your own pasture to graze in. You are the one who has to decide what is best for you and your life. I do.

Neighs and Whinnies,

Shade

P.S. If you want help figuring out where your pasture is, you can talk to my human, Linda Pucci about that. She helps people figure out what to do to be happier, more successful and live with greater ease.

P.P.S. She also has a program to help people discover their life purpose–she says it is “7 Steps to a Life of Meaning & Authenticity.” I don’t really know what that means, but it seems to get people excited.

© 2009 Linda Pucci, Ph.D.

In Times of Stress, Keep Your Sense of Humor

Our humans were gone quite a bit this month. One day there was black smoke pouring out of the top of the building just below our round pen. There was a lot of commotion at Hold Your Horses Farm. A big red truck came up the driveway, and lots of other smaller trucks and cars. Some had lights that moved around and around and they made a lot of noise. One of our humans, Bernie, went away in one of the trucks and came back all wrapped up in white cloth. Then both of the humans went away for awhile.

It was O.K. because they left Charlie, the man that lives in a house next to our field, in charge of feeding and taking care of us. We know him because he sometimes has a garden just over the fence from our pasture. When we stick our heads over the fence when he's working in his yard, he brings us carrots or grass clippings. Imagine being able to eat fresh grass and not even have to tear it with your teeth!

Even though we wondered what happened to our humans, we weren't too worried. We horses live in the moment, so we aren't really very worried about things as long as our needs for food and safety are taken care of. Charlie came over and gave us hay, grain and water every day, and even played with us.

In fact, we had a lot of fun with Charlie. While looking for carrots, I discovered a little box in his pocket. I was able to get it out of his pocket and run away with it. I played with it in my mouth. It was pretty fun to see him come after me and try to get it away. He said it was his cell phone. Maybe he thought I was trying to call my humans. I couldn't get it to work; I guess horse spit made the keys not work quite right.

Another day while Charlie was cleaning the poop out of the shed, Shade slipped into the part of the shed where they keep a trailer and all sorts of neat stuff. I think he was playing that game "Hide and Seek". He hid in that part of the shed and wouldn't come out. After trying and trying to get him to come out, Charlie had to go in and pull him out by his mane.

The point is that having fun during times of stress really helps you cope. I think all humans ought to make sure they keep their sense of humor when things are stressful. When you play (or play jokes) it lightens your mood. I've noticed that when humans play or laugh, their body language changes. They relax, breathe more slowly and do that funny thing with their lips they call a smile. I've noticed when they do that smiling thing, the stress just disappears, at least for awhile.

I'm glad that both of our humans are back, even though Bernie walks around with tape on his arm and limps like he has a stone in his hoof. Don't worry. We'll keep doing things to remind him to keep his sense of humor and I'll bet that the stress will soon go away.

Neighs and Whinnies,

Goomba

PS I was picked to write again this month because I have such a great sense of humor. I've been known to eat buttons off shirts, and you ought to see me with Velcro!

PPS If you want help keeping your sense of humor in times of stress in your life, I'll bet my human, Linda Pucci can help. She's really good at helping you change your perspective about negative things that have happened in your life. And she never eats your buttons or steals your cell phone. Call her at 865-983-7544 to find out what she can do for you.

NOTE FROM LINDA: Goomba is absolutely right about the importance of a sense of humor during times of stress. While we were off at the Burn Unit at Vanderbilt Hospital in Nashville, the stories of Goomba's escapades gave both of us a really good laugh. Having a sense of humor is very important for healing and pain management as well!

© 2009 Linda Pucci, Ph.D.

What Horses Can Tell You About Yourself

If you have wondered about what I do with horses, this slideshow may give you an idea about it...

What Horses Can Tell You About Yourself

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